Name Games

"Hi, I'm Josh!"

"Yeah.. I know. You introduced yourself five minutes ago."

"Wait...did I? Are you that same person?"

"Mhm."

"So...what's your name?"

This had to stop. At some point, I would have to be able to remember faces and names. It's kinda important if I want to meet people. Especially around people who I've seen four or five times, it's not cool to say "hey, I forgot your name...um..sorry" so I have to be subtle about it. But even my old stand-by technique for these situations was beginning to fail too often:

"Hey man, I was putting my number in your phone, and I just wanted to make sure I spelled your name right."

"Hahaha good one."

"No..seriously. How do you spell your name?"

"Wait--actually? ...It's Adam. A-D-A-M."

"Oh. yeah...um cool. Thanks"

Or worse yet, they'll ask how I THINK it's spelled. Dang.

So the resolution was born to know the names of people I talk to. It had been going pretty well, I thought I was on a roll. I could remember the names of people I'd only met once and had hardly talked with. I guess they like that, because it sure did make it easier to talk to them again. 


But then I was thrown a curve ball, in the form of a text message.


"Hey, Breakfast this weekend?"
 


My first inclination was to say "sure!" but then I realized I hadn't checked who sent it to me. Breakfast is a sacred time of day, and I choose my eating partners carefully, in order to start my day off right. This time, however, it came from an unknown number. Frick, I thought, I can't go asking "who is this?" to someone who feels comfortable enough to go for breakfast with me. I can't face that embarrassment. So I was left with only one option:

"Sure, great idea! But I'm tutoring/working both days" (and then in order to fish for some information) "how about during the week?"

The answer was discomforting. "Nope, I work 9-5 every day."

Shucks. So which of my friends work full time and would want to for breakfast with me?  I have gone for breakfast with two people recently, and yet I don't have either number in my phone. Why? Well, facebook usually trumps any other medium of conversation. I at least deduce that I'm texting with a girl. How do I know this? Well, Watson, girls tend to have far more impeccable grammar and sentence structure when texting. And these texts were in A+ shape. But anyways, there was a mystery to solve. So I replied:


"Well we'll have to figure something out."

She says:

"Yeah! There's so much I have to catch up with you"

an hour later:

"What are the chances you are at the Mother Mother concert tonight?"

Okay STOP. That's a pretty obscure concert to casually wonder if I was at, isn't it? This means that she may read my blog, since I don't think I've ever uttered a word about that band in conversation, but it was a Spicy Song Of The Week a while ago....( So, mystery texter, if you're reading this now: you win. I don't have your number saved, and it's driving me crazy. I'm sorry. Breakfast sounds good. Cora's? Cuz Nellie's has mouse poo in their food.)


So she likes Mother Mother, works 9-5, and hasn't seen me in a while. I needed more info to crack this. Perhaps I know their friends?

"No I didn't go to the concert. Who did you go with?"

"Julie gave me a ticket."

Julie. Like most common name everrr. Hope is lost for now...unless...

Ending #1:


We go for breakfast. And I just find out when I get there who the mystery pal is as I scan the restaurant for familiar faces. Then I sit down, order 2 eggs, some ham, beans, pancakes, and tea. Then I smile and say "hey. I'm glad you texted me. It's been a while."And as soon as I leave the restaurant, I change the name of the contact in my phone from "Who???" to their name. Spelled correctly. Because I never had to ask. Because I know my friends' names. Yeah.



Alternate ending:


I book the breakfast date for Sunday morning, at Cora's. I once again forget to set my alarm, and end up arriving late. While I'm on my way over, I get a text from Who??? saying "I have a table, just look for me when you walk in." ..Okay...so now I look for someone I know. I get there, walk in and the place isn't too full yet. And I see one of my friends, sitting alone, clearly waiting for someone. I smile and walk towards her. Then, two tables down I see someone ELSE I know sitting alone, waiting for someone. Oh no. What now? Which person is expecting me? Which person seems surprised to see me? GYAH!



Alternate Alternate ending:

I walk into the restaurant at the chosen time and scan the crowd. I don't recognize anyone. Hmm... Is "Who???" late? Or---oh wait. This is awkward. She might have been texting me as a wrong number. Friiickk. Ok now I look for anyone sitting alone... There. In the corner. She seems nice. I hope it's her, but I don't know for sure. So I call the number on my cellphone. Her phone rings.  I walk over to the table and hold up my phone as she answers hers. 

"Uh..hello?" she says into her phone, trying to put the pieces together, since according to her caller ID, "Laura" is supposed to be calling her and she's apparently running late, but there's a random guy in front of her holding up his cellphone, chuckling.


"Hi," I say, smiling. "Do you know what you're going to order? I'm starving. Breakfast was a great idea!" I sit down as she sits there confused, crack open the menu and look up at her. "So, what's all this news you had to fill me in on?"